False Betayal
by Alyss Mainwaring
Summary: Aly, Alan and Nawat were on a mission. It was only meant to be simple, quick and easy. But something happened that threatened to destroy hope, friendships and love of the deepest kind. Very much the M rating.
1. I

**I had two people ask me for this story but none gave emamils. Two is a good number I think so here is the first section of this story. At the moment it is going to be updated along with the rest of my stories once a month. All I need to do now is edit it.**

**WARNING! HAS PEOPLE GETTING RAPED IN IT!**

**Had to warn you :) **

'I need more time.'

'Aly, you can't. Nawat as well as Alan need to see a healer.'

'Well take them to one. I cannot see why you have not already.'

'We need you with us. We need you to come with us when we go home. Along with the added fact that the men refuse to go home without you. They really do like you, don't they?'

'I still haven't gotten the information that I need.'

'They are ill, Aly! They need help as much as you do! Don't think for even one small tiny second that I have not noticed that you are getting worse every time we see you. You are getting thinner and you are never as happy as you used to be.'

'It's the stress getting to me.'

'Stress? You are working on a mission and you let stress get to you?'

'It can't be helped,' was her abrupt reply.

I turned away and started to walk off with the large limp which had become familiar to me.

'Aly!' the woman called to me again.

'Yes?'

'Just tell me now. Before you go and I promise that I won't bother you anymore.'

'What?'

'Why are you limping and what is wrong with your ankle?'

There was a slight hesitation before I gave her my answer.

'I broke it.'

'What? When? how?'

'I thought that you said that you would leave me alone after I told you that?'

'Please?'

'I cannot remember. So many things have happened since… it is just all a blur now.'

It was obvious that I was telling a lie and I winced at the bullshit of it all. The woman however could tell that something bigger had happened and that I was not going to give up my hidden secrets.

'Aly! What have you gone through? If you can't remember how you broke your ankle then…'

It was worth a try, I read in her eyes.

'Lots of things,' was my answer with a half smile, a small remaining memory of what my character used to be like.

'I have to go. Even being out this long will get me punished,' I said looking around before muttering something under my breath at the sky.

'Come again?' she asked.

'C'est la vie. It translates sort of as such is life. Something we say in Tortoll.'

'Go!'

'I thought you wanted me to stay?'

'Only if you won't get hurt!'

I trudged back through the undergrowth, swearing more vigorously with each step. I did remember how I broke my ankle, but nothing, nor no one, would stop me from keeping it a secret until I was able to tell the right people.


	2. II

**There you go Kiki1forest. I have lived up to what I said I would do. Took me a while to remember what I was doing with this story open.**

**Can you believe it? I just had a story rejected :( Makes me sad. They suggested that I get a beta :)**

**Now I am going to have to do that! Would you mind betaing Drunkedness for me?**

* * *

><p>The sweat pouring down my face.<p>

I had cramps beginning to form from running so much after a long period of rest. I need to start running again, I thought in those frantic moments. He is more fit than me and is catching up.

The sticks created multiple small cuts as I came off the rough but clean, dirt path and ran into the forest.

Hands grabbed a hold of me and threw me onto the floor. We were now so far into the forest that no one would have fond us and we would not hear them if our names were called.

His breath was hot and smelly on my neck.

His arms were tight around mine, choking my heart.

His hot whispering in my ears, filling my ears with demons.

All of it seemed too real to be true to me.

The sun had suddenly lost all brightness and disappeared behind a large cloud. I knew that it was still out there, but losing all of its warmth, hope and comfort in that single tight grip of his. I looked into his eyes with my own terrified ones as he spun me around to face me.

His eyes were cold, hard and filled with lust.

For me.

The hand that pulled at my clothes was cold, startling cold compared to my husband Nawat's. Immediately my eyes started to fill with tears at my betrayal. I would never be able to look at Nawat without the deepest shame ever again.

He gave a cruel smile at the tears starting to show in my eyes. The whole of his face looking sickly triumphant in a distorted sort of way.

His hand, the sick, twisted thing it was, moved slowly, daring me to make a move against him.

And I would have had there not been a dagger in his other hand, warning me of the consequences.

The laugh if it could be called that, burnt a hole right through me, creating a large hole through my heart and lungs.

I felt suffocated.

My hair which had once been a brilliant red to match my mother's was now a cheaply dyed midnight black. Every one of the slaves at this hell hole had to dye it this enclosing colour. My hair now fell forward to cover my face, shielding my deeply saddened eyes from his cold, hard, smiling ones.

All the while that cold hand continued to get closer…

and closer…

and closer…

of stripping me of my clothes and raping me. Taking away all the happiness and sunshine in my life as it did so. Even though I had very little to begin with.

It was like a leach.

A great, big, cold, hairy leach.

Leaches took away blood, the main thing you needed physically to survive. This leach was sucking away my happiness. Blocking me from mentally living and thinking clearly.

Despite all his careful doings to keep me under his grip he got lost in the excitement of raping me. His second hand, the one that went un-noticed with the dagger started to make a gradual decent down.

I started to think about escape and it must have shown in my eyes, that small betraying glimmer of hope. His hands started to move faster to undress me. I would have to act soon if I was to get away with my happiness and freedom I had left.

His eyes were frantic as he grew even more desperate for me. They were smiling sinisterly, burning a deep hole.

Now! I had to move now or not at all.

If I didn't move now, never again would I be able to.

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><p><strong>Live long and ALWAYS remain Ugly :)<strong>

**Alyss Mainwaring**


	3. III

He now had me undressed enough to satisfy his sick needs. I now know why my parents oppose this so much. It destroys the victims happiness and security that is so easy to build up, but once down stays down unless there is a lot of hard work put in.

His own clothes had started to come off now. They were off before I could have blinked my eyes once. He had obviously done this before and enjoyed every minute of it.

His hands cold against the inside of my thighs, pushing them apart, getting them ready for him.

Getting ready to mentally kill me.

His sick face was smiling, grinning with a mad lust to have me. His cold body pressing against mine.

Slowly he slid into me.

The pain and slowness shocked me.

I had thought that he would go suddenly. I couldn't help myself and I gasped. His cruel smile grew, if that was at all possible. I don't know how a smile on his face was possible in the first place.

The sorrow inside me had become deafening. I had lost my chance to escape. My chance to get chance to escape with at least some of my soul. I am never going to be able to look Nawat in the eye ever again. I will break down into tears at the sight of him, my dear, dear, poor husband.

His grip on my wrist was tighter than anything I had ever felt before. I felt and heard one of the bones snap.

His other hand was busy controlling me, forcing me to participate in the sickening activities. Touching and feeling me as he went.

This left my other hand free.

Up until now I had been using that hand to pull assorted sticks and stones from my back as well as to keep me slightly away from him, the cruel sick bastard.

Like that had worked.

Now I brought it up as quick and as hard as I could and snapped his nose. The crack of his nose being broken by my hand was deafening compared to the sorrowful silence that had been the only noise filling my head and heart since before

The noise seemed to shock me into real action and I pushed him out of me and away from me with all the energy I had left and started stumbling away.

To this date, I still have no clue as to where I was going. I just know that I was going somewhere other than here. I could hear him coming through the undergrowth with me but at this moment panic was fueling me.

It was too late when I saw the tree lying down from where it had fallen once upon a sunny day. It was now however covered with leaves, moss, even small branches, making it look like the normal ground covering. It was so well camouflaged that I thought that it was a small hill.

A sharp incline and a gradual decent, it was.

I knew that it would slightly injure me with timing and speed but not help me as it ended up doing. I caught the edge of it and with the top half of my foot. It was at such a great speed and it was at the right spot I heard, for the second time that dreadful day, a loud snap.

Sending me flying, I rolled into the hollowed out base of an ancient tree and layed there, still as silence. My ankle as well as my spirit broken. I was ready to give up. If he had caught me there and then and demanded it of me I would have submitted. And as I prepared to give myself away, at least in the sense that it was me saying yes and not being forced to, he ran past. My eyes opened sharply and I went into a slight state of shock.

He had missed me…

I waited for it so sink in totally, so that I felt it in every bone in my body.

He had missed me!

I lay still for the next hour in that small cove. Enjoying the small sense of security and comfort it gave me. I crawled out of the tiny space of comfort shaking like a single piece of hair blowing in the breeze, and said hello once more to this mean world.

I got up and the tears flowed, no poured, down my face in little river torrents, creating heavy tear tracks that would have been heavily make up to hide. I started to slowly, dejectedly stumble back to my nice, little, place of Hell and looked up to see the time.

I had no clue of how long I was away from the main castle and I should probably know for how long I would get punished for. Each hour was 125 whippings unless you were with a man.

Oh great.

Three hours.

Well I might as well get punished for four as I did three. And I did promise that I would go and report in today, two hours ago...

I hadn't reported recently and I said that I would be there today. That was the reason why I actually left the main hell hole. Also partly the reason why I was raped in a forest and not in a room.

Not that there is a difference, it was and is still wrong.

I stopped going towards hell and started my way to reporting in. I didn't see why I bothered doing it. I was in charge of this mission and was running it fully. I was probably to make sure that I didn't die while they weren't watching or something along those lines.

You know.

Making sure that I am alive and still kicking by having me report to an inferior every couple of weeks or so. And what would Nawat say to all my wining?

This thought brought tears to my eyes, as the mention of his name would forever more to me. He would tell me that if it was not worth it I should stop and try and see the better things in life.

12345

I slowly started limping towards where I was due to meet this woman who thought that she was superior to me.

Funny that.

We hadn't told who I was. My spies had just told her that she was going on a mission that had been organised by the head of the spies, the mysterious Dauni.

We had never said that the mysterious Dauni was actually the only woman participating in this mission. We had also explained to her that we needed someone to camp in the woods to look after some of the people if they were hurt.

It was a very high risk situation and needed extra precautions taken. Really Nawat wanted someone to take care of me if I had done the normal thing and sacrificed myself for some random glorious deed, which I had the habit of doing.

In the end it had been him and Alan needing the attention.


	4. IV

They had both been undercover as guards to this hell hole and they had been injured in one of the mock fights that took place here. You know those mock fights, which I now hate with all of me?

The ones where they used real swords and did not protect them?

Alan had been stabbed through the arm.

They had taken him to the infirmary and decided that "'e was not worth 'ealing". They had taken him inside the forest and had left him there. Left him there to die.

Nawat had done the same thing a couple of weeks later but had gotten stabbed in the stomach. Normally that would have killed him but Alan and I had found him and taken him to the woman in the trees who also had the gift pretty heavy.

It had been touch and go for a long time during those weeks and I was on the verge of abandoning the mission for him, but Nawat had recovered, to my utter relief.

She had been unable to totally heal them as what they really needed was to rest and not have to worry about me, as she said.

Worry about me?

After what had happened before they need not. I was disgraceful. If they decided to not talk to me and ignored me for the rest of my life I would understand fully and accept that.

I would leave, go to another country and probably start working in the goddess' temple. That way no one would ever have to know about what had happened and I would not be betraying anyone.

It seemed like a good plan of action, actually.

I might do that no matter what. Oh well.

What is past is past and I cannot change that no matter what I do and no matter how hard I try.

I saw this woman and started coming back "home." And that brought my thoughts to where I was now.

12345

"Home" was a loose term in this place as it was in any place I have and ever will do a mission in, other than my first one ever. That had become my home more than Tortoll ever was.

It was a castle. Nothing else could describe it.

Five stories high and with 100 rooms on each floor it certainly was not something that you would come across every day.

Especially in the Kyprin isles.

Made of the normal stone inside it was decorated better than the palace where Dove lives. And the servants worked hard to keep it that way, I would know. The fires stroked, the rugs beat and the floors swept with a constant regularity. So constant in fact that it was annoying. Everyone had the same jobs day in and day out. That was what happened apart from two reasons.

One of those was if you did something wrong.

You would be taken into the dungeon (yes they even had one of those, more impressive too,) and whipped. Sometimes if they were feeling generous they would just leave you there for a couple of days and let the starvation get to you.

The other reason was a bit more nasty and was the reason I normally tried to avoid.

If a higher up male took a fancy to you he would be allowed to "keep" you for two days. After that he had to give you back and you would have a day to work before you could be called up again.

Who was any male higher than you?

What it seems. Any male at all.

Apart from the baroness, who helped run the place every other woman was at least under the lowest male.

A barbaric way of living but the way they ran things here. The male had all the rights.

If he wanted he would have you parade totally nude in front of him one night or call you from your duties to have a day time canoodle.

If you slacked off in anyway or started slipping behind, you would be the person they whipped; his name would not even receive a mention.

"They" where assorted people.

The baron or baroness, the tortures, the professional prison guards who worked more as a punisher than as a guard. I suppose that the qualification just helped in that industry.

People stopped thinking about running once they heard that you were one of them. They were not known for being nice.

The guards would be known to laugh as you screamed, making bets on how long you would last. Every day all the servants would line up in front of the main mistress, at least all the female ones.

And that was where I found myself now.


	5. V

Odd isn't it, how fear had a funny way of ruining everything.

I managed to get to the line up just before le diable came up and started to inspect.

'You are really starting to cut it close,' whispered to girl next to me.

'I know, I was caught up this time, it wasn't me I swea –'

I was unable to continue as there is a very strict no talking rule when she is walking the "lines".

During this time it was so silent that it even made sense to hold your breath. I realised that I was holding my breath and let it go, silently though, they killed you even if you breathed loud as with anything else.

My eyes started to tear up as le diable started to come closer. There was only so much someone could take before they broke entirely, and I was on the border line now.

But no! I was not going to fall into this pit of misery! I could not!

There might be no life inside of my or even waiting for me outside this hell hole but that did not mean that everyone was the same.

I was not doing this for myself.

I was doing this for all the poor babies born into this world of misery, where your soul was taken from you and where any chance of freedom was immediately dispelled.

I was doing this for the women brought here from the slave docks. So that they could have a proper chance at life.

I had once led that life, I do not know how people led it every day of their waking lives, never once wishing for freedom or even to run away from it all when it grew to overwhelming.

I was doing it for the people I cared about and the people I tried so hard to take care about. This never happened at the castle, was my first and only thought before le diable came up.

Scrutinising the girl next to me she seemed fairly please with her handy work so far and I was thinking that things would start to look up for me.

I thought too fast didn't I?

She got to me and her face turned sour.

'What have you been doing girl?'

I remained silent as was expected of me.

'Well, I cannot have this roaming Her Grace's vackra slottet. I know what I will do of you. You will go off any food for the next month. And then? And then we will see. Go back to you previous work, smutsigt en.'

And the horrible bitch walked on.

Leaving me to wonder as to what I was going to do now.

12345

The big heavy door of the female eating room slammed open, signalling that someone was going to be in trouble.

Most undoubtedly me.

Six men in third level suits marched up to me, hatred in their eyes. The guards had a way of order. They had a test you had to pass to go up in station.

It went up to ten and they were the most experienced and most hardened warriors.

The level ten's rarely ever went to fighting, they just taught the lower levels and guarded the baron. There were also only ever five of them at once.

If someone was excelling at the ninth level and was ready to move up the oldest "tenner" would be killed. It was a safe way of making sure that none of their secrets ever got out. None ever did, that's what drew my attention to this place.

The "threers" walked up to me and grabbed me by the top of my arms.

Their grip was truly ironfilled.

The fiver walked up to le diable and talked to her in a loud pompous booming voice, making sure that it carried over to the rest of us poor souls and taught us a lesson.

'This woman,' he spat at my feet. I scrunched up my face in distain. I pity the poor lass who had to clean that up.

'Has ignored the rules of our society. She refused to let a man enjoy her company and needs to be punished for it.'

The idiot made it sound like I had declined an offer to take a walk in the park with someone. Not what happened, truly.

'Is it understood that she will need to report down to the dungeons once she is finished here? My men will wait with her.'

'No, she is done here. This is not in the right shape for here and has been banned from here for a month. Take her.'

He nodded his head and spoke again to le diable.

'I am in room twenty three. I will expect to meet you there this afternoon. I will be waiting.'

The cruel sick minds of this world.

The men dragged me down into the dungeons. Smiling the whole way. As I was taken, more like dragged out, I had the eyes of every single one of those women on me.

And you know what?

Only one of them was happy, and that was la diable. Makes sense.

There were even tears pouring down the kind woman's face as she watched. She knew what had happened and what was going to happen.

In a way I wish that I had. Then I could have prepared for it.

But then I was glad that I didn't. The memory still is unpleasant in my mind and burns a hole almost every time I recount it.

They took me down and had me flogged.

They never said why or what I had done, they just did it mercilessly and laughed at my reactions the whole way through it.

Never again am I ever going to be happy with just completing half of something. I will live it out to the end. That is what this had taught me. Off all the things it could have taught me that is what it did.

Nothing is ever complete unless you put your heart and soul into it. Only then can you say that it is done and file it away into your mental cabinet.

They then left me.


	6. VI

I was left alone to my own devices, with nothing to do. I was unable to move due to still being attached to the flogging post but I was able to open my eyes without having to see one of _them._

A pleasant change I must say.

During that time I thought of a song, something simple that I had learnt how to play before I turned 15. It was nothing special, just something that gave me hope in the darkest times.

Though none of those times were ever like this. And I never thought they would be.

I was left like this for hours and this gave me time to think about many things that wanted to be thought of but gave grief when done so.

I think that I felt tears at least five times during the couple of hours. They probably came many more times but those were the times that I was in the real world and not flying out with the Kudarung, the crows and Nawat.

Mentioning his name brought me to the real world though and I think I might have rambled a tad.

I will forever know those as the worst hours of my life.

I did not know what was going to become of me and what I was being punished for. I had time then to think over my actions in my life.

"To do things I will never regret and to leave the rest behind."

This was what kept me going even when I thought that I would give up.

I thought about Nawat and imagined every possible reaction to my betrayal to him. Strangely enough though, none of them had him accepting me or being understanding. Not like that would happen ever.

I had made love with another man, wither willingly or not, it did not matter because I had gone against him. I imagined me having to tell Dove that I was going to another country and never coming back.

Ever.

She would not be happy about that. She is going to try her hardest to persuade me to stay. But she doesn't understand.

Even lock me in my room if she had to and order me to stay there until I had come to my senses. But I would protest for I knew that I still had my senses.

I know that she wouldn't hesitate in any of it. And she didn't need to.

I thought about what my life would be after that. I went through sneaking away even though they had people watching, which was what was sure to happen.

Catching a boat in another name, a name which would become my own and what I would go by the rest of my life.

Finding a temple somewhere hidden, unpopular not busy and living my life along their lines.

Not a life generally preferred by someone with my nature and wish for freedom. I then took some thought in what name I was going to use.

I had to be something that I already answered to or something that I was familiar to hearing. I would have to leave my whole life behind, with nothing to carry by.

I choose to revert back to my whole name as it sounded like I was a proper woman and someone to listen to.

Alianne.

That was what I was going to be called by the rest of my life. Odd considering that I had spent my whole life avoiding that name and now I was purposely going back to it to avoid the life that had once been so kind to me.

It would be easier for everyone if I just faked my death. Suicide was always an easy option because it meant that you did not need to set anybody up. And I would hate to have anyone killed for me, by my friends.

The local cliff was called Freedoms Edge.

A fitting name don't you think?

Many people had taken their lives off this cliff and thus given its name. They had gone to their freedom, lost the shells of mortality and found happiness. They would leave their shoes and jewellery to one side in a certain place which was checked every morning for the objects.

If there was anything I was notified and told to find out who it was and to then notify the family. Most of the time the family just nodded and said that it was terrible but they understood that it was going to happen soon.

I wondered about who was going to be notified of my "death"?

They would probably go to my room and open it eventually to find me missing, by that time I hoped to be half way across the islands and heading to my new life.

They would then go to Dove and tell her and she would organise a search party for me. Most likely with Nawat at the lead.

He would go to Freedoms Edge and look at the things of the deceased.

Only to find the latest necklace he had given to me gently placed on the top with care and love. His grief would be great but I am positive that he would understand. He had to!

Under I will put a single piece of paper with one word.

"Sorry."

Everyone would be astonished and upset but they would get over it soon. I wasn't that important for them to miss me for very long. Nawat would find a new wife to give him multiple nestlings to rob the Hawk's nest with and they would grow up to be strong, fine, stunning adults finding their right place in the world.

Dove would be able to find another spymaster with the greatest of ease, since that is what I have been training them for from the start, for a just in case I died. Which could happen I must tell you.

And maybe one day they would find me just out of coincidence and I would tell them what I did and why.

Making my heart free and light and at peace finally.

I worked out the kinks of my plan of action, detailing how I would sneak out of the castle to how I would place the necklace to how I would write the letter and if I should place a signature or not on it.

But first things first.

I needed to get out of here.

The small door of the dungeon slammed open once more, not bringing my freedom, as I had hoped but something worse, far worse.

The man who had raped me walked in with a knowing smirk that told too much and a confident walk that suggested too much for my liking.

He continued walking right up to me and punched me.

'You have been whipped and I have just punched you. Not enough of a punishment in my eyes but alas, I am limited by what my uppers say.'

Once again I was able to watch him strip, once again feeling like I was going to have a bigger reason to go and join the goddess temple when I got out of there.

His hand reached up my leg slowly and confidently, unhurried unlike before. I was chained up now and he knew it.

Trailing up my leg, taking the dress with it, like the dress wasn't even there. Once there he continued to ignore the dress even though it was greatly in his way, or at least I hopped so.

My loincloth was soon on the floor followed by the skirt of my dress, which was detachable, like it was made for this monstrosity.

But then again, it probably was.

The hunger in his eyes was even greater than before, if possible and I was surprised to not see drool dripping down from that mouth of his. His head came up to my ear to whisper something before he had his fun.

'But they never said anything about this though.'

Once more he had his fun within me.

Killing more of my soul every second like it was some kind of quest where he tried to see what he could do. Hard it is to describe what really happened because I have locked that memory up. Himself inside me is one of the things that will never leave though no matter how hard I try.

His breath once again hot on my check forcing me to try and shift back somehow to escape even this tiny discomfort.

He tried to kiss me only to find my mouth thoroughly closed. I was not going to let this monster in no matter what!

To my sorrow once more he solved that problem, like it was a tiny prick in his back, only giving him a slight discomfort and easily removed.

He shoved himself inside of me hard, not slowly like the last time. This time he was going to enjoy it as much as he could.

I gasped and he took the opportunity to get his tongue inside of my mouth. I could feel his smirk against my mouth.

I wanted to bite down hard, take of some if not most of his tongue but I couldn't.


	7. Offer

**I have a special one time Christmas offer for you all.**

**Anyone who reviews on Christmas day (25****th****) I will go to their page and review at least on all of their stories. Even if I don't know their categories. If I get really involved in the story then I will review every chapter.**

**A review for a review.**

**(You might get the reviews after Christmas day as I am normally really busy but if I am able to on that day…)**

**Merry Christmas to you and your kin!**

**Alyss Mainwaring**


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